The Weekend Update: 16 July 2017

Well… to start off this update… first of all: My BF, T is not dead!!! Who da FUCK would do something like this???

(Short answer: Those GOD DAMNED Mormon Danites who’s been targeting ME and now HIM!)

Long answer: T had to go to Ohio for one of his shows (He’s a karaoke singer AND an Elvis impersonator… he sure can pass as Elvis Presley!)… and his phone got stolen…

So… guess what? Yeah, he and I had plans on June 7th for Steak ‘n Shake to reciprocate for the meal I treated him at King Buffet the week prior… and I thought he ditched out on me.

So, apparently, his “neighbor Brandon” alerted me THAT SATURDAY that he was in the hospital, in the ICU on his deathbed, and since T and I made plans for that Thursday, and then I was alerted on The Doll Forum that same afternoon, on his “mannequin man” account,  by a “doctor” with some Indian name that he passed away… Was I heartbroken!

Then someone impersonating his GF, D, possibly this same person, on T’s TDF account, sent a Private Message to Nescio50 informing him of his death, and to me also!

So, now T has a lot of explaining to do. Not to me, Oh fuck no. To Nescio50 because someone hacked T’s TDF account!

Am I gonna sue the Mormon church over this? Fuck yeah I am, and so is T. They have to be tried here in Delaware County (Indiana). Not muthafuckin’ Salt Lake City.

Details on that later.

But, about a couple of days ago, I bought a pop (soda to some of y’all) from the Aldi on Madison Street and 26th Street, and as I was waiting at the intersection for the light to change, someone was beeping at me. I crossed over and while this car was pulling into the Village Pantry, I saw it was D! An excerpt of the conversation follows:

Me: (hyperventilating) Sorry… for… what… happened!
D: For what? Alexa, T and I thought you were dead!
Me: What?! D, I’m not dead… I thought T was dead!
D: Alexa, there’s a thread on TDF about you being dead!
Me: No… there’s a whole thread on TDF about T being dead… someone, possibly you, said that he died in an ICU in Ohio!
D: No, the thread stated that you were found dead by Muncie PD in your apartment with your dolls! And I never wrote that on TDF!! Look, I only have fifteen minutes before the bread store closes on 12th Street, so let me tell you that T ain’t dead… he lost his phone when he was in Ohio… he’s been without a phone for a couple of months… so you need to call T as soon as you get home!
Me: Oh, thank God! I was about to give you my condolences, but now I am happy to learn that I don’t have to! (Pause) D, you have a pen and paper? I need to give you my new number to give to T…
D: You got a phone now? Let me get a pen and paper so you can give me your number so I can give it to him… (Looks in her car for a pen and a notepad) You still staying at [where you’re at] now? (Writes down her number first, then gives me the notepad with pen and I write my number)
Me: Yep. But, please, have T give me a call ASAP. I have a LOT to talk to him about!
D:
Sure thing, Alexa. Hey, I’ll talk to you later. (Takes off)

I then walked down 26th Street back to my apartment, singing “Hasa Diga Eebowai” and instead of “God,” I used “Thomas Monson” in place…

Which leads to…

Elisabeth!

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, dolls too, Elisabeth is coming home soon! In less than two weeks!!!!! T and I are gonna place the order with Mon Amour Toujours together!

He and I have ALWAYS talked about going in together for a doll… now’s our chance.

Okay… later.

 

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